One night, many years ago, my wife wanted me to put on an apron so that I didn’t ruin my clothes with oil splattering from the food we were cooking. The only apron we had was hers, and while it was not overly feminine, it was feminine enough. Therefore, I refused and did not wear the apron. This was hard for my wife to understand as she didn’t think the apron was very feminine and didn’t view it as crossdressing, but I knew for me it was the right choice. After explaining my reasons, she accepted my choice and had no problem.
I knew that if I had put the apron on, I would have either felt some pleasure from feeling like I was crossdressing, or I would have felt awkward and strange from feeling like I was crossdressing. Either way, I knew I did not want to do it. I also knew that in the past I had read transgender fiction stories that started out just so innocently as a wife asking her husband to wear an apron. I knew that wearing an apron should be a harmless thing, but I knew that for me personally, it was the wrong choice. I knew it could set me off the next day or week into many temptations. The apron was avoided, so no fantasies or temptations came as a result of this episode.
As the years went by, and as I have resisted crossdressing and healed from this addiction, I have grown stronger. I have since worn an apron many times without an issue. I can even wear a more feminine looking apron and not have any problems. But just to be on the safe side, I had my wife get me a masculine apron just for me. I wear it with pride and don’t have to even have crossdressing enter my head.
The lesson here for all of you is to know your limits. We are all at different points in our healing from this addiction. Don’t do things just because they are technically okay if they will trigger you into temptation. Put up some good boundaries. As you heal and recover from addiction, you can start venturing out through those boundaries safely. But be vigilant, keep your guard up, and make good decisions.